Today’s New York Value is happy because I’m happy. Happy in a personal sense, at least. I'm not happy about the children being ripped away from their parents at the border, but I'm going to take this time to be positive.
So positive, in fact, that I’m writing something NICE about the trains! All this extra time spent waiting between stations and being held for zero reason gives people more time to interact. And sometimes these interactions are beautiful.
About a month ago I was headed downtown on the C train and saw a young man and woman sitting across from each other, with an adorable girl of about 4 in between, hanging on the pole (which I normally hate, but I make exceptions for children). I initially thought they were a family, but it became clear the two adults had just met because of the woman's daughter. They started talking, and eventually he moved over to sit next to her. When he went to get off at his stop both of their phones were dead and they couldn’t exchange numbers. Instead of just letting him go she asked him to stay on the train, wrote down her info for him, and then the three of them all got off together.
I’ve seen some messed up shit on the subway, but that adorable pickup/meet cute will help me get through the next few months of questionable behavior.
The real estate value is also a weird but optimistic one related to couples meeting in New York. People often move in together earlier on in their relationships than they might in other locations. When your rent or mortgage is as high as in NYC, the conversation about sharing costs and taking that next step can happen pretty quickly, especially when one party's lease is up and they aren't happy with their living situation.
I've worked with multiple people who are making a move because they want to live with their significant others. I've also had people invite relative strangers to live with them in the city, sometimes ending up in marriage! It makes sense -- you need to make 40x the monthly rent annually to qualify for a rental here. With two incomes you can either afford a much nicer one bedroom than with just one, or you can both save money (or all three of you, no judgment!) by splitting an affordable spot.
Dating in this city can be a mess, but at least you learn pretty quickly whether you're compatible with someone because of everything you have to navigate. I firmly believe in cohabitation before marriage or having kids or whatever, so the city pressuring you into it can be the make-or-break you need to know if it will work.
Also, apologies for entirely forgetting to do a wkndr last Friday — I went home to Virginia again, and no one needs another 500 words about how much I love Clarke County. But I'll definitely do one this week, and try to make it more informative and less sleep deprived than the last!
xo
Anna